AFL 2019: Grand Final Drinking Game

The 2019 Grand Final is almost upon us, and while Richmond and Giants fans are likely to need just the game alone to get their blood racing, neutral fans might need a little more to get excited about. So while the fans of the two competing teams are going through three hours or agony watching their teams compete for the game’s ultimate prize, we have devised this drinking game to keep everybody else equally enthralled in the action.

THE RULES

Opening Bounce = One Drink – Let’s get this party started.
Anytime they pan to Mason Cox’s parents in the crowd = One Drink.
Anytime Stephen Coniglio is on screen or his making himself unavailable for selection is mentioned = One Drink after agreeing with everyone in the room “Ultimate team man”.
Anytime Alex Rance’s Knee Reconstruction is mentioned = One Drink.
Anytime the centre bounce is recalled = One Drink and yell “You had one job”.
Anytime BT or any member of the commentary team uses the phrase ‘foot candy’ = One Drink.
Anytime Bruce asks a rhetorical question = one drink after telling nobody in particular that “it’d be wrong not to.”
Anytime they pan to Mick Molloy looking nervous in the grand stand = one drink.
Anytime they pan to a celebrating Mick Molloy in the Grand Stand = finish your drink.
Anytime they mention how important Toby Greene is, or his Preliminary Final suspension = One Drink.
Whenever there is a score review called = Drink until the review, or your drink, is completed whichever comes first.
Anytime Heath Shaw’s family and their Grand Final History is mentioned = One Drink after agreeing with everybody in the room that “The Shaw’s are Collingwood Royalty”.
Whenever they pan to Callum Ward, Jack Graham, Brett Deldio or Alex Rance = One Drink after expressing “what a shame” with the person next to you.
Whenever Tom Lynch or Jeremy Cameron kicks a goal = One Drink.
Whenever Dylan Grimes or Phil Davis kicks a goal = Finish your drink.
Whenever Lingy gives his opinion on a free kick or contentious decision = One Drink after yelling “Who cares Lingy?”.
When Dustin Marin delivers a ‘don’t argue’ = One Drink. If he is tackled or penalised after doing so = Finish your drink.
Whenever it is mentioned that Marlion Pickett is playing his debut game = One Drink.
If it is mentioned that the last player to debut for Richmond in a Grand Final never played another game = Finish your drink.
Whenever they pan to the GWS President in the crowd = Stop Drinking Immediately! – You’ve had enough and your eyes are playing tricks on you. Channel Seven won’t be panning to the GWS president in the crowd!